The Arkansas Project

8 Responses to “These Tea Parties, What’s That All About?”

1. Coon Dog Says:
   June 19th, 2009 at 3:19 pm

   D,

   If you displaced Otis or Pat Lynch I’m going to be pissed.

   CD

2. Cameron Bluff Says:
   June 19th, 2009 at 8:13 pm

   Sounds to me as if you are being drawn back into the great chasm of MSM. Beware David, beware. She is a subtle temptress, a sassy siren, and you will be trapped before you know it. The beginnings of the web she weaves are in place. Run while there is still time my friend. Take the money and run.

3. nemo Says:
   June 19th, 2009 at 9:33 pm

   I love the way the ads tie right in with your story.

4. DumbArkie Says:
   June 20th, 2009 at 12:48 pm

   David,

   I for one applaud you for this nostalgic delivery of week-old news. I’m getting giddy just thinking about getting up early Sunday morning and driving down to the convenience store to make my purchase. Oh, the ways of yesteryear!

   Just the thought is making childhood memories race through my head like fireflies on a clear June night. I’m tasting in my mind one of those old Co’-Colas made with cane sugar in a 6-1/2 ounce glass bottle. (You know, back before they messed it up with corn syrup.) I can see myself pickin’ strawberries and I hear my Pawpaw tellin’ me to put at least one strawberry in the bucket for every one I eat! I can hear my Momma tellin’ me “if you want some iced tea, hon, go on out to the back porch and pick us some mint, ya hear?” If I squint just right I can see Suzie Mae Crawford down at the bauxite pit takin’ off her clothes to go swimmin’ in her birthday suit.

   Wait… What’s this I see? It’s the Baker boys draggin’ that potato sack into the woods. I can still see the looks on their faces when they saw me. I can feel Bobby Lee Baker’s slippery blood-soaked fingers squishin’ my mouth together as Billy Ray Baker points his finger at me and says “if ya know what’s good fer ya, y’aint seen nuthin’! Ya hear?!

   Thanks a lot Kinkade! My therapist doesn’t work on the weekends, you bastard! Buy a paper. Yeah right.

5. David Kinkade Says:
   June 20th, 2009 at 12:59 pm

   Gosh, DumbArkie, your nostalgic visions of yesteryear are a lot more detailed and picturesque than mine. Mine mostly entail me sitting on the couch with a half can of Pringles watching “Welcome Back Kotter” reruns.
   D.

6. DumbArkie Says:
   June 20th, 2009 at 1:05 pm

   David,

   If the Oxford American asks you for reprint rights, I get my usual cut, right???

7. David Kinkade Says:
   June 20th, 2009 at 1:22 pm

   “Usual cut,” yes. Meaning, I still have some of those Pringles left.
   D.

8. Coon Dog Says:
   June 21st, 2009 at 4:16 pm

   David,

   Thanks man. Out of desperation I started reading the article to my newborn and it worked well. He fell asleep after the first section.

   Outstanding!!! Keep them coming. I would consider it a service and an outstanding value for my $1.25 I clunk into the yellow machine.